Just a quick update. Progress slowly continues on my upper-middle-grade fantasy novel attempt, Moonrise Ink, my first thus-far-successful attempt at writing something of this length. Almost to the end. I’m still slogging through the climax scene. But it’s like Zeno’s paradox; the closer I get to the climax moment of the climax scene, the slower I seem to write. It’s as if I want to be more and more careful about everything, and obsess over every detail. A reader will probably read over several hour’s worth of work in less than a minute. That is, my extra effort will probably go unnoticed.
And, I confess, I feel apprehensive about something, though I’m not sure what. Perhaps I shouldn’t even try to guess, but I think it’s the insecurity of imagining no agents or publishers ever being interested in this work, and feeling like all the time and effort put into this thing will come to nothing. Which I rationally realize is ridiculous. Odds are rarely in favor of a first novel being professionally published, and the middle-grade fantasy market is crowded. And, anyway, I’ve learned a lot about writing in the process. Looking back to the novel’s first chapters, which I wrote about a year and a half ago (and which will certainly need plenty of editing), I feel my writing has definitely improved. The novel is already a success in that regard. Still, the fear eats at me every now and then.
But my emotions also swing the other way, when I’m not thinking about craft technicalities or career dreams, when I’m just thinking about the world and the characters and the story. I get goosebumps and feel all epic. What writer doesn’t? It’s the call that lures any storyteller.
Anyway, only a few parts left to write of the climax, then three or four short scenes to wrap things up. I wish I could say I’d be done by the end of the week, but at my current rate, who knows. One word at a time.
